The Life and Weather Forecast

Lesley's Blog

Today it's raining. For a state that has a strong leaning towards drought conditions, the Spring rains are really important. So, we are grateful for the moisture that is pouring onto the Center of Oklahoma. The forecast was for occasional showers in the West. In this area of the country we are getting used to "hysterical" weather forecasts. Now I know that is partly because we are in tornado alley and the spotting and tracking of tornadoes can be life saving but at times we are told adamantly that one thing will happen and it doesn't or it happens in a completely different way.

The weather is a lot like life. Some days or times are like the sunshine, warm and nourishing. Other times are like storms, drenching us in difficult happenings and emotions. When our lives are filled with hail, freezing rain and mounds of snow we know we are in for overwhelming circumstances and can only hope we have what it takes to cope. Then there are those times when we are faced with the most serious of situations, the tornado times, when are lives can be ripped apart and we are holding on with all the strength we can muster.

(Even the "sun" times can feel too much and we need shade.)

Thinking about our lives like the weather helps us know that there are good times and not such good times. It is unrealistic to expect life to not have ups and downs, and many of them. Weather is also unpredictable and uncontrollable like so many things that occur in our lives to challenge us and help us strengthen our emotional muscles. But one of the best things about the weather is it comes and it goes and so do all the difficult times in our lives.  The rain stops eventually and the sun shines. The tornado dissipates and although we are left to clean up the mess, we are no longer in the thick of the trauma. Even with serious illnesses, we have days that are somewhat more bearable than others and for most of us, we have not lived our whole life with that challenge. I know the comparison is not exact by any means and I apologize to those whose lives are unbearable for long periods of time. But for most of us it is helpful when we are in the downs to remember that things come and go and eventually we come up. 

Weather forecasts are really interesting and the forecasters can work up quite a sweat telling us over and over again about some upcoming catastrophic weather event. The intensity can be fascinating and keep us glued to the screen. Unfortunately it is not an exact science and after many inaccurate forecasts we can feel that they are "crying wolf" and simply ignore their predictions.  Neither the complete belief or the complete rejection is very helpful.

(During "frozen" times it's best to stay loose.)

When we are growing up, authority figures tell us what to believe and what not to believe. They tell us who were are and who we should be and what sources of information are valid and what are not. When we become adults, a task we are face with is to challenge all of that and come to some sense about our own truth. Who do we think we are? What do we believe and what do we trust to tell us something that is close to the truth? It is a formidable challenge, especially in this day and age when there is so much information that it can be overwhelming. All that external "authority" is like the weather forecast. There is some truth in some of what others tell us but they certainly do not have the definitive answers for us. We have to figure that out for ourselves constantly asking the question "Is this true for me?". And the seeking of our truth is an evolving process for life is not black or white, even though we think that would make it easier. There are all manner of shades of all manner of colors and certainly no one size fits all. 

So, enjoy whatever the "weather" is at any given moment and take shelter" during the most threatening times. And  enter into a process of discernment for your truth with vigor, an open mind and plenty of patience and with a willingness to be surprised, just like with the weather.          

Wild Thing

Lesley's Blog

Eric and I have just returned from celebrating our wedding anniversary in New Orleans. My first time there, I found it to be a wonderful city to visit. We did all the typical tourist things: walking around the French Quarter, enjoying the jazz at Preservation Hall and in the streets, eating Beignets at Cafe Du Monde and all manner of delicious seafood at other restaurants, taking the streetcar to the Garden District to see the cemetery and the beautiful antebellum houses, visiting the Museum of Southern Art and the Aquarium.

We also participated in another typical tourist activity, a Swamp Tour. The scenery was beautiful but, of course, we were there to see the wild life, including the alligators. Much to our amazement marshmallows were used to to lure the animals from hiding and one type of treat fitted all as they also beckoned the racoons and the wild hogs. Those hairy pigs had been well trained and sat by the boats with their mouths open. Quite a sight.

But I am not really writing to give you a blow by blow account of our vacation. Seeing the wild scenery of the swamp and the wild boars got me thinking about wildness.  New Orleans has risen and, at times, fallen on what we think of wildness. We are all familiar with how the "wildness" of the weather and the ocean overwhelmed the city, almost bringing it to its knees. Assisted by the strength of the spirits of the people from that remarkable city it was rebuilt. Just as with Noah in the Great Flood, the dove found dry land and resurrection began.

During Mardi Gras, the city truly goes "wild". It is a time when anything goes and even the most staid of people get swept into the spirit of uninhibited behavior, or what we often label "wild". On any given night Bourbon Street is filled with folks who have imbibed more than a drink or two, all sorts of interesting looking attire and or course, the sound of music and the smell of wonderful food. One of the great things about Mardi Gras is that in many ways it gives the opportunity for "controlled" disinhibition. It is a set time period, in a specific place and manner and gives us lots of stories to tell when we are in our dotage.Many cultures, now and over the centuries have offered experiences during which people are given "permission" to act out for a limited time period before returning again to their regular, well socialized lives.

But another way to consider wildness is to look at the idea of inner wildness which I think about as our true nature, that part of us that is less influenced by the socialized human world. It is my belief that this wildness can be thought of as our basic essence and it is not linked to "anything goes", uninhibited, impulsive and often reckless behavior. From my perspective, such wildness is basically loving and kind and joyful. It is manifest in unexpected courage and the spirit that rebuilt New Orleans. It is the dove of peace and reconciliation that finds the calm after the storm and is willing to start again. It is found in the joy we experience in the little things in life and the laughter we share with good friends. It is the aspect of us that reveals our deepest desires that are for our highest good and assists in manifesting those desires. Spiritual discernment is what often leads us to know our inner wildness and that requires alone time and silence, not easily come by in our busy, goal directed society.

So, where do the wild boars come into these meandering thoughts of mine? They are not indigenous to the Americas and, as we have expanded our developments into more and more habitats of all animals, the boars have been squeezed too. They are in all the wrong places and have become increasingly destructive of things that we consider our right to have left alone. Originally their predators were wolves or tigers and during the time when nature was more able to balance itself, the populations were kept under control. Not so now. 

How are they like us? When we are in the "wrong" place emotionally we too can be destructive. Often we find ourselves "squeezed" into lives that feel confined and unsatisfying and, in an effort to cope, behavior that is harmful to us and others can ensue. So we need to ensure that our frontal lobes keep appropriate control of our choices, keeping our tendencies to be out of control well monitored. Now that is not the same as living a life without meaning, joy and creativity and, in fact, when we do allow all aspects of our brain to give input to create balance, then our lives our rich and full. A true wild life.     

        

Spring forward

Lesley's Blog

It's been a while since we wrote our blog. My excuse, if I need one, is that my novel has occupied and satisfied the writing space in my life. But it's finally Spring and like the ducks and geese and all the other creatures who are in a flurry of activity with the coming of this season, I feel a little boost of energy, in spite of my lungs having bronchitis.I was thrilled to watch three red cardinals, two males and one female having playfully, serious interactions about mating and territory by the koi pond a few days ago and knew the vigor of Spring was beginning to burst forth.

  

Every season is wonderful and it seems no time at all since the yard was covered in snow and Chanel, who was born and raised in Illinois and loves the cold weather, came into the house looking like a snowman (or snowdog) after sitting outside for several hours, by choice. Those were the days when I looked from the inside out, watching the calming flakes make everything pure. Winter feels like a time of purification, of reflection into ourselves, a time when we die to our "sins" and wait in patience for the time of renewed life. 

And here it is, a new beginning. Spring is a good time for forgiveness of ourselves and others so we can leave behind some of the darkness that has dulled our energies, dragging us down, and we can make that opening for the light to come in. And, as if to remind us, lightness is all around. We are blessed with longer days and warmer temperatures that delight our hearts, unless we are the ones who will have to mow the grass that has suddenly begun to grow. The cherry blossoms, which seem to arrive overnight, bring brightness to the streets and gardens and never fail to receive a gasp of joy from me. The daffodils are bursting forth and there is a sense of anticipation of the newness to come.

Our creativity, that might have been silenced by winter's dormancy, is chomping at the bit. On the large pond by our house, such energy is made manifest by fluffy new baby ducks and geese but for us it might be expressed by going to the garden store for a flat of pansies to add a special splash of color to the slowly greening yard. For others, Spring cleaning, which I regard as much overrated, might come to mind or a new project that you have been brewing all winter. But whatever creative process you choose, whether great or small, make sure it feels light and joyful.

Spring reminds that all things are fresh and new when we bring that attitude to all aspects of our life. It can help us "reset" ourselves so that "chores" become moments of truly caring for our home and we look for times to bring gladness to the hearts of all who enter our lives. We are given the opportunity to mend that which is broken both within and without as we open out hearts to newness of life.

But there is nothing perfect about the rush of Spring. It comes in fits and starts and seems wonderfully haphazard and messy. Here, the beautiful sunshine has been dampened by glorious Spring rains that bring much needed water. But, following in its wake come the weeds, crowding out the plants we had hoped to see instead. It is all perfectly imperfect and frustrating, just like us. 

So, enjoy this new season and all that it offers, and enjoy yourself, with all your perfect imperfection. You don't have to be perfect to be perfect. The thing that is perfect is the beauty of the process of growth and change that flows in the Springtime place of us and radiates forth to change the world one tiny little bit with its commitment to love, kindness, peace and joy.   
    

IF I WERE A RICH MAN

Eric's Blog

If I Were A Rich Man

I'd biddy, biddy 

Bum

All day long

I'd biddy biddy 

Bum

If I were

A wealthy man

I AM

Wealth is a personal feeling. For some it means having so much money they can do and buy anything they want. For others, they feel wealthy if they have a roof over their heads, no matter how basic, simple food on the table and enough paying work to keep it there. 

I am fortunate enough to not only have the roof and the food but can pay all the bills, have money for projects and play and even afford heat and air conditioning and a used car that is relatively young. I feel a very wealthy man.

(loving and beloved in an amazing country)

I also know that richness is a lot more than money and things, even more than the basic necessities. For a life to be truly wealthy, loving, kind relationships with others are of paramount importance. I would probably also add a dose of creativity, joy and nature. 

So, I biddy, biddy bum along, feeling that I am a rich man. My basic needs and wants are met and I love and am beloved. I can happily biddy, biddy bum.    

The wonderful wonders of the W.C. (Water closet)

Lesley's Blog

In the last few months two of our three W.C's (aka toilets or loos) have been "on the blink". At first it was marginally irritating when one of them would not quite turn off completely once the flush cycle was over. Then I would have to get up from the couch, reflush, and wait to make sure it didn't drip. But somehow we simply got used to it. It just seemed part of our life and lethargy had become well entrenched.



We had actually tried everything to fix that downstairs loo, including a complete replacement of the innards of the tank, but it was all to no avail. Finally we tacked on replacing that loo to the completion of painting the kitchen cabinets (a job that I had done partly an embarrassingly long time ago). We loved having both projects done and had for a while a new appreciation for the wonders of a working toilet. 

Like many times when we have such renewed appreciation for something, including being alive, it did not seem to last very long before we began to take it for granted once again. 

However, almost as soon as the downstairs loo was fixed, the upstairs, master bathroom W.C. decided to up the ante on us. Until then we had made it manageable by simply making sure that when we flushed we turned the handle back to the horizontal position (which it had stopped doing automatically). We are of the age when visits to the bathroom in the night are much more frequent than they used to be and much more frequent than we would like. Now with this new problem it became quite an ordeal to make sure the loo both flushed and turned off and we had to keep the top off the tank. The middle of the night bathroom visits took on a whole different meaning. 

So, it wasn't long until we had had enough. It was different level of seriousness than the downstairs toilet. Middle of the night loo activity is serious stuff. The loo replacers came last week again and it truly is wonderful to have two fully working W.C.'s. Every time I visit them I am grateful.

I would like this gratitude to last longer and to expand to a renewed appreciation of all the wonderful things that we hardly notice in our everyday life, like clean running water that can also be hot and electricity that among other things keeps us warm and cool. We live in an amazing world and maybe this time I can be thankful for everything every day that I live and also be thankful for my life.            

RITUALS FOR LIVING

Eric's blog

Rituals for Living

 

Every morning

It is time

To walk the dogs

 

Every Thursday morning

It is time

To do yard work

 

Every evening after supper

It is time

To put the dishwasher on

 

 

Ritual times for doing certain chores and activities make life simpler. They include plans for activities that need to be taken care of in order for us to remain well balanced and in control. When we ritualize things that need to be done, we do them without thinking about them. In the "big picture" we already made that choice that they are important to include in our lives.

 





 (It will be full by the time we have cleaned up after dinner!)

 

Too much choice may actually be a problem. It can lead to "I don't feel like doing it" or "I can put it off until later". Later often magnifies the problem and choice and projects can become overwhelming.

 

Establishing rituals and sticking to those routines can help us balance work and play as well as exercise and rest in our lives.

 



Don't let the turkeys get you down.

Lesley's Blog

It's New Year's Eve and I will be cooking a turkey today. Eric and I were out of town for Christmas so I will enjoy preparing that delicious food and snuggling on the sofa with Eric and the dogs, watching Thunder basketball this evening.

This year maybe we can all follow the title of this blog and "Don't let the turkeys get you down." Even though there are many people and experiences that come into our lives that can be classified as those "turkeys" we do have a choice how to respond. We can be overwhelmed, irritated, angry etc. or recognize that most things are not life threatening and, in the big picture of life, not that consequential. It is also helpful to remember that most of us can be "turkeys" at times and if we do not want to be judged, it is advisable not to judge.

(I don't have a photograph of an actual turkey but this is one of the "turkey ducks" that roam around our neighborhood, driving our dogs to frantic barking.)

 

But back to the actual bird. For native peoples the turkey is sometimes thought of as the "Earth Eagle" and so is associated with the spiritual concept of the Earth as our Mother, bringing to us the blessings of abundance and fertility in all ways. These beautiful birds invite us to give thanks for our blessings and to share those blessings with others.





(Another pseudo turkey picture, this time of turkey vultures roosting for the night. A symbol of sharing space and blessings.)

 

The planet Earth blesses us everyday with great and wondrous abundance and yet many of us take those blessings for granted. We as a nation, myself included, do harmful things to the environment everyday and waste resources in small and large ways. Native peoples honored the turkey, as they did the buffalo and all other blessings of the Earth. When they killed, which was just for food, they gave thanks to the animals and plants and made sure nothing was wasted. They made whistles from the bones of the turkey, beautiful decorations from the feathers and used all the meat in their food preparations. 

In this country, it can seem a losing battle, trying to have any impact on improving the environment and yet, as with everything, every little counts. To keep our own bodies strong and healthy we have to honor and care for them, seeing ourselves as spiritual beings with an obligation to care for ourselves and others. In the same way we might see the Body of our Mother the Earth as sacred and our duty being to take care of her.

So, maybe this year, one of our resolutions can be to do a little more to care for and love out spectacular planet.